Click Click... Are you getting excited?
Planning, organizing, and enjoying family photo shoots with ADD/ADHD can be challenging. Some family members may be filled with anxiety or overwhelmed - others may be consumed by itches or overall discomfort.
Understanding and empathizing with those feelings is important. Validating the discomfort allows a safe place for discomfort, a feeling of belonging and love. Phrases like, "I understand how different clothes can make you cry," or relating this foreign experience to a funny cartoon character or animal are little strategies to help everyone emerge intact.
The good news is that family photo shoots can be done on a DSLR camera like this, or a much less intimidating phone seen in everyday life. Don't let the opportunity escape- planning the perfect photo shoot with special needs kids starts now. Even if the perfect photo doesn't happen, approaching the session with gratitude and pride helps everyone have a better experience. There still may be tears, but if moms and dads are calm everyone benefits.
With the help of this family photoshoot guide, you'll learn how to plan ahead, capture unforgettable moments and make memories that will last a lifetime.
15 TIPS TO PLAN A FAMILY PHOTO SHOOT WITH SPECIAL NEEDS
#1. Pick the best time of day
When planning for a family photo session, timing is key. Ensure that the shoot does not coincide with nap time and pick an hour when
everyone will be as energized and alert as possible - think post-mealtime. To
keep smiles bright throughout, try to make sure it doesn't drag on too long; if
you have many people in tow, your best bet is to focus on capturing the
kids first before moving on to other shots.
#2. Pick a familiar location
Pick somewhere close to home or at home. Getting everyone ready, dressed, into the car, and then placed into an unfamiliar setting can be a recipe for a family photo shoot disaster. Try to think of places where the child(ren) and you have fun. Photographers can work magic wherever you are.
#3. Pick the outfits
Go onto Pinterest, Instagram, or Facebook and look for family photoshoot inspiration. Pick a color palette you enjoy, then make sure those colors actually look good on everyone. Allow for a variety in fabric, texture, and type of shirt, pants, skirt, or dress. Consider whether your child will wear the new clothing. This may be a year or season where that child's favorite outfit dictates the "theme" of the shoot. Have fun with it.
A general rule of thumb is to not pick patterns or stripes. Focus on clothing that has vertical lines like an open jacket, vest, or sweater.
Don't forget your shoes and socks! Picking brown, black, bare feet or running shoes often gets overlooked. Include belts in your planning and white or black socks or tights.
What's the worst thing that could happen? "When the choice is either laugh or cry," said Sarah Paxton, a mom of five, "I always pick laugh. I try to approach situations with smiles and reflect on photo shoot disasters with fondness."
"If the child throws a massive fit, sometimes recording a video, then showing it to them during the tantrum or outburst will stop it immediately. We both usually end up laughing."
Clothing color variety can either be monochromatic or complementary. Both choices look good.
If all else fails, just wear dino costumes. This roaring fashion style is available in both adult and children sizes. Adult sizes: https://amzn.to/3YFSRYf Children sizes: https://amzn.to/3jpc9RH It will be a day you, your family, and friends will never EVER forget!
#4 Layer accessories
Unless you pick the dino costume option, it's a good idea to also pick accessories for each outfit. Look closely at your favorite family photo shoot inspirations. More likely than not, the clothing will have more than one layer. There will also be necklaces, earrings, an extra jacket or scarf, and special hair accessories. This is because photos look good with more depth. These additions beautifully draw the eye.
While accessories take additional time to plan, buy, or organize, they also present difficulties for parents with children with special needs. Prepare in advance a few choices for accessories. Giving them choices allows them to have more control in an uncomfortable situation.
#5 Set aside all photo shoot clothing
In one central location, hidden from plain sight, store all the shirts, pants, shoes, socks, underwear, and accessories. This not only helps with planning and making sure everyone has a complete outfit, it also helps keep everything clean and unwrinkled.
Little hands won't get into the new items or wrinkle newly ironed shirts. If your child loves surprises, photo shoots are the perfect opportunity for a fun surprise of a new outfit or fun hair bow.
#6 Plan the day
This differs from planning the time of day the photo shoot will occur. Enough time has to be set aside for haircuts, tantrums, bathing, dressing, and unexpected events. Include a lot of time for you to get ready yourself.
Whatever schedule you make for the day, prioritize yourself. It will show in your photos and increase the likelihood you enjoy the experience. Take the mom-bun and sweatpants off. It's time to pretend like you have it all together.
"We may not have it all together, but together we have it all."
Yes, you will probably be exhausted the entire time, but when the day is over, and you get the photos back, it will all. be worth it.
#7 Surprises
While new accessories and outfits can be surprises, treats, toys or play cameras can also add to the experience to distract from uncomfortable physical and emotional experiences of special needs kids. It doesn't have to be fancy, but having a "bag of tricks" with a few options will help you have a backup option or two if tears erupt.
#8 Jokes
Relate the clothing or photo shoot experience to something the child loves. Maybe it is Pokemon, and they're wearing red or yellow. "You look like ....! (insert superheroes name here)
Or, if the dress is shiny like Cinderella, give praise saying she looks just like Cinderella. If there is an item with faux fur, easily call it "the bear sweater."
"Do you want to wear your bear sweater?" It may bring laughs.
Taking your child's mind off the unfamiliar and placing it into something very familiar helps the body relax.
#9 Allow for hidden joy
What the camera can't see doesn't matter. Toys like squish balls or a switch controller can easily be hidden and out of sight. With the object nearby, the child will have another opportunity to feel more comfortable and at home.
#10 Emotional regulation
Prepare for situations where you as the parent may get upset, frustrated, or disappointed. Run through these emotional experiences mentally and how you will handle them. Find thoughts that will help you keep everything in perspective. Be an example throughout the day. Plan small times when you can breathe deeply and meditate to calm your body and mind. Approach each step with grace and kindness for the expected and unexpected. Prioritize your ability to remain calm, joyful, and thankful that everyone is a part of this "day mom made them take a photo."
#11 Family traditions and rituals
Family photos are not a ritual or tradition everyone in the family may value. But family photos can be part of a ritual, which are experiences that do create value regardless of enjoyment. Family traditions and rituals help unite a family. They are an event that everyone can count on. One or two days a year, having everyone clean, dressed beautifully, in one place, and participating in the same activity at the same time is an event to be celebrated. Looking back, you may not remember the details, but you will see a cherished image.
#12 Hire a photographer
If hiring a photographer isn't in the budget, ask a talented friend or family member to take the photos. Not only does it reduce stress as a parent, but it also puts it on the calendar. Additionally, if a deposit is paid, there is an additional incentive to ensure it happens. Professional photographers know their stuff. The price is worth the memories that will remain for generations to come.
#13 Enlist help
Having a friend or caregiver attend reduces your workload and gives the photographer another set of hands to hold items, make funny faces, or watch kids while groupings are being photographed. Even if it is unnecessary, this will reduce your mental workload and allow you to enjoy the experience. Help is also a great idea when getting everyone ready and looking good one at a time. They can help inject some fun and joy into stressful moments.
#14 Screen photographers
This may take time you don't have, but asking briefly, or extensively when contacting photographers if they have experience with special needs kids, highly sensitive children, or unpredictable situations, may increase the likelihood of getting a great photo. You will also be able to gauge their temperament when it comes to ADD/ADHD. Either it's a fit, or it's not. Quickly move along if there is discomfort in their tone or response. Not everyone can have an amazing ADD family.
#15 Props
Blankets, stuffed animals, toys, or pillows bring familiarity into photo shoots and reduce uncomfortable physical sensations. Blankets cover the grass, keep kids warm, and bring more color and depth to the shoot. Go ahead and put a few extras in the car for those, "just in case," moments. The blanket could be familiar, but it could also be new and coordinate with outfits.
Finally, celebrate! Jump into cozy clothes and cuddle up together. Watch a movie, eat pizza, and sleep. You've done something HUGE. Everyone has survived and deserves a reward. It may take a couple of days to recover, and that's alright. The experience will be worth it. Tell your spouse and kids how grateful you are for them and how well they did. Emphasize the moments where they overcame emotions or discomfort. Share that you are proud of them. Say thank you.
Good job FAMILY!
Do you have any other ideas or tips? Share below!
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